Better Relationships: Ten Top Tips

By: Tom Dane

We all want to get along better with others. Sometimes it just feels so damn awkward with certain people though! Wouldn't it be great if we knew simple principles that enabled us to experience more satisfying relationships.

The following Top Ten Tips offer you some simple advice that you can begin to apply right now.

1. Remember that however unreasonable someone is acting their behaviour is derived from a positive intention. When you 'act as if' all behaviour has a positive intention behind it, through discovering it, your life will become more pleasant. An example: You meet an angry person and you think how childish and silly they are. But if you were to ask yourself, "what is the positive intention behind this persons angry behaviour?", you could come up with something useful that allows you to feel more comfortable. For instance people often act angry because behind this they believe it will protect them from harm.

2. When you find yourself feeling uncomfortable in an interaction 'get some perspective' by disassociating. In your minds eye see yourself and the other person interacting over there, rather like you would if you were to see a movie of the situation.

3. Step into their shoes. This is one of the most powerful methods for gaining wisdom about your relationships. To begin you imagine communicating with the other person, noticing how they talk, observe their facial expressions and so on. You then 'step into their shoes' and see through their eyes and hear through their ears. So of course you will be looking at yourself! Run through a conversation you've had before that could of been better. Notice 'yourself' and become aware of how seeing things from this other persons perspective gives you knew insights into the relationship. This method is described in more detail in my free mini-course.

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Does The Law Of Attraction Work?

By: Sa'Diyya Patel

Does The Law Of Attraction Really Work?

You've watched The Secret, read the book, and been inspired to make some change in your life. Perhaps you've started visualizing, saying affirmations and created a dream board. But nothing seems to be happening. Why isn't it working? Does the Law Of Attraction really work or is it just another hype-filled quick-fix that produce no real results in the real world.

The Law Of Attraction, like all Universal Laws, works 100% of the time...no exceptions. One of the hardest concepts to accept about the law of attraction is the concept of personal accountability and accepting 100% responsibility for ALL aspects of your life. Whatever you have in your life right now, you have attracted by virtue of your thoughts.

99% of people who hear this will immediately say "But I don't want an abusive spouse, or all this debt or this health problem or whatever. And don't tell me that I brought this on myself. Why would I do that?" And then they conclude that The Law of Attraction doesn't work or is utter rubbish.

Perhaps you've felt this way too. You're going through all the motions but the results just aren't showing up. Why? You're stuck right where you are....or worse yet, you may be attracting what you don't want. It can be painful and frustrating to live a life that is so different from the one you really want. So you're stuck asking "Does The Law of Attraction Work?"

YES, The Law of Attraction does work. So what's wrong? Why aren't you manifesting the life of your dreams?

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The Secret to Remaining Calm No Matter What is Going On Around You

By: Wil Dieck

Everyday we are bombarded with things that make us want to explode. We wake up to find our spouse has left a mess in the bathroom, or the kids are fighting in their bedroom. We break up the kids or clean the bathroom, dress, grab a cup of coffee and quickly run out the door, only to be cut off on the freeway by some jerk that gives us a one-finger wave when we politely beep at him. We get to the office only to be greeted by whiney employees and our boss who tells us the report we spent six hours on yesterday isn't complete and she needs it in an hour. And its only 9 AM! So what's the secret to staying cool, calm and composed while maintaining our self esteem in a tough environment? Here are a few tips to think about as a starter guide to self improvement.

There is a type of crab that exhibit a rather interesting behavior. To catch these crabs, crabbers put pieces of dead fish in a crab cage and then lower it down into the water to the sea bottom. What happens next is very interesting. One crab will enter the cage and start to eat the fish, soon followed by another, and then another and then another until the cage is teeming with crabs and all the fish is gone. What's interesting is the crabs will continue to linger in the crab cage, even though the food is gone. If a poor crab decides that he's tired of this and starts to climb out of the cage the other crabs will grab him and pull him back down. In fact, they will rip him apart if he doesn't stay put. After a while the crabbers come along and pull up the cage so no crab escapes alive.

Does this sound familiar? In life it can seem like everything and everyone else around you is pulling you down, preventing you from climbing higher than where you are at. These crabs will destroy your confidence and self esteem, pulling you down in ways you won't even remember. Don't let these crabs destroy your confidence, or get the best of you. So how do you avoid these crab cages?

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How to Eliminate Stress

By: Duke Xenner

What is it? Stress is tension. When you are stressed, your body tenses up, you are less relaxed, you are more irritable, more critical, less creative, less productive, more overwhelmed, and your over-all lowered state of health. Mental, emotional and physical health.

It is the single thing that is extraordinarily simple to change, but plays all the difference in your life. Most people have a unique set of causes for stress, but from my experience living in a high-stress environment, there are certain things that I've found to be most helpful.

In no particular order, here are some of the best ways to get rid of stress:

1. Physical Activity (No less than 30 minutes moderate or 15 minutes intense)

- The more stressed you are, the more active you should be every day

2. Listen to some high-energy music (for me, party music and metal work the best)

3. Listen to some relaxing sounds (slow music or natural sounds like wind or waves)

4. Take up a hobby (anything you enjoy doing, hopefully constructive)

5. Have a goal to work toward

- Direction in your life helps you clear up most turmoil and handle anything that comes your way with greater ease

- Anything you encounter is either for or against your efforts toward that goal

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How To Defeat Procrastination In 9 Easy Steps

By: Amy Jones

When it comes to seeking success and achieving wealth, procrastination is one of the biggest enemies that hinders the financial, personal, and mental development of an individual.

Coupled with laziness and a lack of motivation, procrastination has the power to crush dreams and hold one back from accomplishing the goals they have set for themselves.

While procrastination is quite common, there are plenty of ways to get back on track and embrace the things that can lead to success, wealth, and prosperity.

At some point in everyone's life, procrastination strikes. It could be as simple as waiting until the very last minute to take the garbage out or as serious as putting off an important medical checkup. The more of a habit that procrastination becomes in life, the harder it is to achieve success in the things you wish to accomplish. One of the first steps towards overcoming procrastination is to envision the desired level of achievement and plan a course of action that brings you closer to set goals.

When you are interested in achieving success, time management becomes an important part of the process. A few ways to overcome procrastination include:

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Give Yourself A Potential Makeover

By : Gary Vurnum

Unfulfilled potential.

We all have it.

It's like a little chip on our shoulder reminding us -
"You can do better"
"You can make more of yourself"

But...we know that being the top salesman, fast-track manager, or best-selling author is far, far out of our reach.

Or is it?

Why do you think it is? Can you PROVE that you haven't got the necessary talent or credentials for the job?

You're probably more qualified than them as well, aren't you?

So - what's stopping you from seeing your true potential?

Well...in most cases three words are responsible :
"Fear of failure"

It's nothing to be ashamed of - at the moment I KNOW that I am subconsciously limiting myself because I KNOW that I am not succeeding to my true potential.

The difference is - because I am aware of it - I can force myself to do something about it.

I'm as human as you are.

So - even as I write this - I am working hard to push down those thoughts that say:
"What if it goes wrong?"
"What if I lose money?"
"But...I'm not worthy" etc etc

Even the greatest successes in the world share my thoughts - so I know that I'm not alone.

And neither are you, too.

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How to Attract Love Through Affirmations

By: Jeff Staniforth

Love is that ethereal experience that makes us feel completely alive. Where every sense is heightened, every emotion is magnified, our everyday reality is transcended, and life seems worthwhile. Love is the ultimate nourishment of the soul.

It is said that the entire array of human needs is rooted in our need for love. Our yearning for fame, fortune and material things all boil down to our need to be acknowledged, respected, admired - and above all, loved.
No truer words have been said than those that George Sand wrote: "There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved."

The good news is, you can develop the skill to live a full and joyful life, enhanced by love -- and experience all the profound manifestations that love brings. Employing positive, loving affirmations will help you develop that skill.

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How To Bore Your Way To Success

By: Gary Vurnum

OK. I'll admit it. I'm passionate about success. I think about it every day. I think about it as I drift off to sleep. I think about it when I catch myself being idle for five minutes. I can't help it. It's my drug. And - everywhere I look...I find what I'm looking for! I see things now that I used to miss before. I pick up those little clues that I can use to my advantage.

The clues are there - if you look hard enough. Do you remember when you were a love-struck teenager? How the 'love of your life' consumed every waking moment, and totally destroyed your relationships with your friends who quickly took second place to 'the one'? Well...I'm like that. Except that I've managed to control my 'urges' to make sure that I play an active role in my family's upbringing.

At the ripe old age of 32 I'd rather read a book than go out for a drink! Why? I choose to do so because I know that unless I constantly search for the clues to success - I won't find them. So - out with novels. In with biographies and non-fiction! If there was a "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" solely on success and personal development - I'd win it! But...what's this got to do with you, I bet you're wondering. EVERYTHING!

You see - you don't have to turn into a 'success bore' like me to find out a path that works for you. You just have to find a subject that you are really passionate about - and then become a 'bore' in that!

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The Key to a Better Life

By: Fadzil Dolmani

Time management is basically about being focused. The Pareto Principle also known as the '80:20 Rule' states that 80% of efforts that are not time managed or unfocused generates only 20% of the desired output. However, 80% of the desired output can be generated using only 20% of a well time managed effort. Although the ratio '80:20' is only arbitrary, it is used to put emphasis on how much is lost or how much can be gained with time management.

Some people view time management as a list of rules that involves scheduling of appointments, goal settings, thorough planning, creating things to do lists and prioritizing. These are the core basics of time management that should be understood to develop an efficient personal time management skill. These basic skills can be fine tuned further to include the finer points of each skill that can give you that extra reserve to make the results you desire.

But there is more skills involved in time management than the core basics. Skills such as decision making, inherent abilities such as emotional intelligence and critical thinking are also essential to your personal growth.

Personal time management involves everything you do. No matter how big and no matter how small, everything counts. Each new knowledge you acquire, each new advice you consider, each new skill you develop should be taken into consideration.

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"Why Do Some Affirmations *Work* - and Others Don't?"

By: Jeff Staniforth

By definition, an affirmation is a statement repeated time and again either verbally or mentally -- or written down. The words of the affirmation statement - in themselves -when spoken, thought of, or written *without* a pictorial (visualized) or emotional connection -- make a very weak affirmation.
Affirmations, when worded correctly -- and when emotionally charged - are able to tap into the unlimited creative power of your subconscious mind, and manifest your desires.

Affirmations are not all created equal. Some are, of course, better than others. There are *power affirmations* that have been proven again and again to work - and I'll reveal some of them in a moment.
When you examine the structure of these power affirmations, you, too, can learn how to create your own powerful affirmations for your specific purposes.

Consider the following:
"I am what I choose to be."
"All my needs are met instantaneously."
"I love and accept myself exactly as I am."
"_____________ comes to me easily and effortlessly."
(Fill in the blank with what you desire.)
"I am now perfectly healthy in body, mind and spirit."
"I now create my wonderful, ideal life."

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How Do You Measure Your Achievements?

By: Gary Vurnum

"My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me."

This quote isn't one of my own - although I would like to echo its sentiments.
It was the great Winston Churchill who said it. A man who lead the Allies to victory in the Second World War.

A man who became one of Britain's most-loved heroes.
Yet - even though he achieved more in his life than you or I could possibly imagine - he certainly knew what was the most important part of his life.

It's easy to measure your achievements by the material things you have, or by how much money you earn.

It's much harder to put a value on those things that are vitally important for a happy and successful life:
- A good relationship with your spouse
- Happy, 'balanced' children
- Your health
- Somewhere to live

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"A Better You" Your 7 Days Program To Self-Improvement

By: Fadzil Dolmani

I seem to lose count on how many times I've read and heard of celebrity marriages failing almost left and right. Not that I care (and personally I don't), it seems strange that we often see movie and TV stars as flawless people, living the fairytale life of riches and glamour. I suppose we all have to stop sticking our heads in the clouds and face reality.

There are many ways to lose your sense of self-esteem despite of how trivial it could get. But whatever happens, we should all try not to lose our own sense of self.

So what does it take to be a cut above the rest? Here are some of the things you can think and improve on that should be enough for a week.

1. Know your purpose
Are you wandering through life with little direction - hoping that you'll find happiness, health and prosperity? Identify your life purpose or mission statement and you will have your own unique compass that will lead you to your truth north every time.

This may seem tricky at first when you see yourself to be in a tight or even dead end. But there's always that little loophole to turn things around and you can make a big difference to yourself.

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Unlock Your Self Improvement Power

By: Fadzil Dolmani

When we look at a certain object, a painting for example – we won’t be able to appreciate what’s in it, what is painted and what else goes with it if the painting is just an inch away from our face. But if we try to take it a little further, we’ll have a clearer vision of the whole art work.

We reach a point in our life when we are ready for change and a whole bunch of information that will help us unlock our self improvement power. Until then, something can be staring us right under our nose but we don’t see it. The only time we think of unlocking our self improvement power is when everything got worst. Take the frog principle for example –

Try placing Frog A in a pot of boiling water. What happens? He twerps! He jumps off! Why? Because he is not able to tolerate sudden change in his environment – the water temperature. Then try Frog B: place him in a lukewarm water, then turn the gas stove on. Wait until the water reaches a certain boiling point. Frog B then thinks “Ooh… it’s a bit warm in here”.

People are like Frog B in general. Today, Anna thinks Carl hates her. Tomorrow, Patrick walks up to her and told her he hates her. Anna stays the same and doesn’t mind what her friends says. The next day, she learned that Kim and John also abhors her. Anna doesn’t realize at once the importance and the need for self improvement until the entire community hates her.
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Setting Your Goals - Easier Said, Easily Done

By: Fadzil Dolmani

The basics of setting a goal is an open secret known by top-caliber athletes, successful businessmen and businesswomen and all types of achievers in all the different fields. The basics of setting goals give you short-term and long-term motivation and focus. They help you set focus on the acquisition of required knowledge and help you to plan and organize your resources and your time so that you can get the best out of your life.

Setting clearly defined short term and long term goals will enable you to measure your progress and achieve personal satisfaction once you have successfully met your goals. Charting your progress will also enable you to actually see the stages of completion leading to the actual realization of your goals. This eliminates the feeling of a long and pointless grind towards achieving your goal. Your self-confidence and level of competence will also improve as you will be more aware of your capabilities as you complete or achieve your goals.

The basics of goal settings will involve deciding what you really want to do with your personal life and what short term and long term goals you need to achieve it. Then you have to break down goals into the smaller and manageable targets that you must complete in your way to achieving your lifetime targets. Once you have your list waste no time in tackling your goals.

A good way to have a manageable list is to have a daily and weekly set of goals. By doing this you will be always in the position of going towards your life plan goals. Everyday will give you the opportunity to fulfill a certain goal giving you the feeling of accomplishment.

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Creating Effective and Efficient Relationships

By: Fadzil Dolmani

Relationships of all kinds are often perceived as very delicate things, that require extra effort to maintain. However, a relationship can also be something that can provide security and can also be long lasting despite many trials.

Building an effective and lasting relationships is a necessity for several reasons. For example in a group or organization, the well being of the people depends on how efficient and effective that group or organization works.

The group or organization is also dependent on how the members work well with the management.

An ineffective group or organization can really be very frustrating. An effective group or organization can also ask so much on their members, that sometimes the members would be having no life outside the walls of the area where they work or sacrifice the other aspects of their life just to meet deadlines. For an organization or group with this kind of scenario, relationships can be stressed or suffer from breakdown.

People or other entities who depend on these groups or organization also suffer.

Society is defined as a web of relationships, which requires all parties to work and contribute their share in order to achieve a common goal. Having a relationship that is good, where cooperation and respect are manifested, can make society work better. In this way each member works for the good of the whole and towards achieving a common goal. This can only be attained with effective and efficient relationships.
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Power Through The People

By: Fadzil Dolmani

Have you come across a person who is so naturally friendly that when you put him inside a room of strangers, he'll be friends with almost everyone in no time? We call such a people-person, someone unbelievably nice and charismatic that he can charm anyone into doing anything.

A socially-empowered person achieves so much greatness, basically because of the people that catapult him to success. He earns the trust and all-out support of the people, whom he had helped before. He never runs out of help. He can do anything with the plethora of people behind him. All because he knows he maximizes his social potential!

See, if you know your social skills and you make use of them, you will reach self-empowerment. Self-empowerment is making a general overhaul in your life and turning yourself into a happier and more successful person. If you can be one of those people-persons, then I can't see any reason why you will not succeed. You just have to know how to start.

1. Be genuine.

Hypocrisy will just bring you all the way down. Be genuinely nice and interested to people. Once they perceive that you are Mr. Hypocrite with selfish intentions, you might as well say goodbye to self-empowerment.
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The Powers Of A Positive Attitude

By: Fadzil Dolmani

I am going to ask you to something very weird right now. First of all, I want you to listen to your thoughts. Now tell me, what thoughts fill your head? Would you label them as positive, or negative? Now let's say you are walking down the street with these thoughts. Do you think anyone who would meet you would be able to tell you what’s on your mind? The answer to number one is up to you. But, the answer number two can be pretty generic. Although people will not be able to tell you exactly what you think, they will more or less have an idea of how you are feeling.

Here's another question. When you enter a party filled with friends, do they all fall silent as if something terrible had happened? Or does everybody there perk up as if waiting for something exciting to happen? You know what? The answer to all these depends on your frame of mind. Thoughts are very powerful. They affect your general attitude. The attitude you carry reflects on your appearance, too – unless, of course, you are a great actor. And it doesn't end there. Your attitude can also affect people around you. The type of attitude you carry depends on you. It can be either positive or negative.

Positive thoughts have a filling effect. They are admittedly invigorating. Plus, the people around the person carrying positive thoughts are usually energized by this type of attitude. Negative thoughts on the other hand have a sapping effect on other people. Aside from making you look gloomy and sad, negative thoughts can turn a festive gathering into a funeral wake. A positive attitude attracts people, while a negative attitude repels them. People tend to shy away from those who carry a negative attitude.

We can also define attitude as the way of looking at the world. If you choose to focus on the negative things in the world, more or less you have a negative attitude brewing up. However, if you choose to focus on the positive things, you are more likely carry a positive attitude. You have much to gain from a very positive attitude. For one, studies have shown that a positive attitude promotes better health. Those with this kind of attitude also have more friends. Projecting a positive attitude also helps one to handle stress and problems better than those who have a negative attitude.
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Why Is It Important To Improve Your Self ?

By: Tim Maher

Sometimes, when all our doubts, fears and insecurities wrap ourselves up, we always come up with the idea of "I wish I was somebody else." More often than not, we think and believe that someone or rather, most people are better than us.- when in reality, the fact is, most people are more scared than us.

You spot a totally eye-catching girl sitting by herself at a party, casually sipping on a glass of Asti Spumanti. You think to yourself, "she looks so perfectly calm and confident." But if you could read through her transparent mind, you would see a bunch of clouds of thoughts and you might just be amazed that she's thinking "are people talking about why I am seated here alone?... Why don't guys find me attractive? I don't like my ankles, they look too skinny I wish I was as intelligent as my best friend."


We look at a young business entrepreneur and say "Wooh what else could he ask for?" He stares at himself in the mirror and murmurs to himself, "I hate my big eyes I wonder why my friends won't talk to me I hope mom and dad would still work things out."

Isn't it funny? We look at other people, envy them for looking so outrageously perfect and wish we could trade places with them, while they look at us and think of the same thing. We are insecure of other people who themselves are insecure of us. We suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and lose hope in self improvement because we are enveloped in quiet desperation. [Read full article]

What Makes All the Difference? MONEY!

By: Lynn Moore

If your goal is to amass more money, good on ya! Go for it. You have a right to be rich.

How do you feel about shouting that goal to the stars? Do some people tell you that you are too materialistic or that your goal should be more lofty such as serving others or more 'realistic' by asking for less? That you only 'need' $50,000 a year to live on and asking for a $1,000,000 is greedy?

The bare bones, unvarnished truth is the wheels of this world are turned by commerce. And the medium of trade is money. Without it we are back to paying the doctor with a chicken, growing and preserving all our own food, having the livestock vet or the blacksmith yank out your aching tooth and making mattresses out of tree boughs!

No thank you, I like my creature comforts.

Let's take a literal look at money. It's simply a coin forged of metal or a piece of colourful paper. If you gave a $1,000 bill to a native in the deepest, most isolated part of the Amazon jungle what do you think he would do with it? Of course it would be of little or no value except to maybe help him start his fire.

So it isn't money per sae, it's the connotation we put on it. You don't really want money, you want what it will purchase and supply in your life. You want what it will allow you to do. [Read full article]

Mastering Motivation (lessons In Creating Forever Change)

By: Craig Harper

Motivation (a few definitions):
(1) A psychological concept with no single universally accepted definition, but which organisational sociologists believe concerns the determinants of intent, effort and tenacity, factors that push or pull us as individuals to behave in a particular manner.

(2) Feelings that drive someone toward a particular objective.


(3) The push of the mental forces to accomplish an action. Unsatisfied needs motivate. On the biological level basic human needs of food, shelter and survival are powerful motivators. On the psychological level people need to be understood, affirmed, validated and appreciated. On the business level motivation occurs when people perceive a clear business reason for pursuing a transfer of knowledge or practices.

If you look up the word Motivation you'll find many contrasting, and almost contradictory definitions of what it is (I found over fifty in five minutes).
It seems that even those who define it aren't exactly sure what it is.
It is definitely (in my opinion anyway) the most over-used (and mis-understood) word on the personal development landscape.

We all kinda know what it is... but at the same time, we don't.
It seems that motivation is (represented by) different things for different people.

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